Armageddon

Gone Girl takes up the story of Nick and Amy Dunne's difficult marriage, which is floundering for several reasons. Nick, a former journalist of some seriousness, loses his job due to downsizing. In a somewhat desperate state of mind, he relocates himself and his wife from New York City to the small Midwestern town of North Carthage, Missouri, where Nick is from. There, he opens a bar, using the last of his wife's trust fund, and runs it along with his twin sister Margo. The bar provides a decent living for the three Dunnes, but the Dunne marriage becomes more and more dysfunctional. Amy loved her life in New York and hates what she considers the soulless "McMansion" which she and Nick are now renting.

Cousin Mike returns, and brings his new wife, as well as the cult he joined, with him.

Ted and Barney go out in the town to celebrate St. Patrick's Day as if there is no tomorrow, where Ted is seemingly rewarded for every bad behavior. Meanwhile, Lily and Marshall discover a major flaw with their new apartment, the floor is slanted. Robin helps them invent "roller luge". Ted finds a yellow umbrella that may be "Mother's".

Gene, Louise, Tina, and their friends go on a journey to look for a mythical creature that supposedly lives nearby. Meanwhile, during downtime at the restaurant, Linda's competitive nature sends her into overdrive. * Bob's Burger of the Day: To Thine Own Self Be Bleu $5.95

Michael has but one thing to do: sign a few dozen routine documents. To procrastinate, Michael makes Ryan update emergency contact information of the staff. When Michael gets Ryan's mobile phone number, he constantly prank calls Ryan with crude impersonations of Michael Jackson, Mike Tyson, and Saddam Hussein. Talk of Dwight's karate experience gets Michael's competitive juices flowing, leading to a lunchtime match between the two at Dwight's dojo. Jim goes too far flirting with Pam, and she abruptly shuts him down when their co-workers take notice. After a pathetic showing by both combatants, Michael emerges victorious over Dwight, which leads to Dwight changing his emergency contact from "Michael Scott" to "The Hospital". At the end of the day, Michael promotes Dwight from Assistant to the Regional Manager to Assistant Regional Manager, most likely to ensure that Dwight will still idolize him despite the hard feelings over their lunchtime battle. The rest of the staff, fed up with Michael's inability to accomplish even the simplest task, are forced to forge his signatures on the documents so they can go home. On the way out, Jim gives Pam a bag of chips. Pam quietly takes them and stares in a forgiving manner after Jim.

Sam Witwicky is a teenager involved in a war between the heroic Autobots and the evil Decepticons, two factions of alien robots who can disguise themselves by transforming into everyday machinery. The Decepticons desire control of the All Spark, the object that created their robotic race, with the intention of using it to build an army by giving life to the machines of Earth.