George R. R. Martin

The cable television series closely follows the multiple storylines of the A Song of Ice and Fire series, and author Martin has stated that the show's pilot script was very faithful to his work. Set in the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros, where "summers span decades and winters can last a lifetime," Game of Thrones chronicles the violent dynastic struggles among the kingdom's noble families for control of the Iron Throne; as the series opens, additional threats from the snow and ice covered region north of Westeros and from the eastern continent across a narrow sea are simultaneously beginning to rise. * 2016 Golden Globe Nominee - Best Television Series - Drama

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Stewie has an attention problem at school, so Lois takes him to Dr. Hartman, who promptly gives him a prescription to treat ADHD. When Stewie takes the pills, he becomes totally drugged out. Brian is initially upset about this, but when Meg mentions the benefits of it, he decides to try it himself. They both become so hooked on it that they do various wacky things. Brian and Stewie eventually decide to go to Connecticut and see George R. R. Martin to impress him with an elaborate system Brian made for a book, but Martin declines it and figured out the drug he's on. Ultimately, they both decide that they don't need the pills and return home, but when they leave, another Martin shows up on a motor scooter and claims that the Martin present is an impostor. Meanwhile, Quagmire shows off his cooking skills and, based upon a suggestion from Lois, decides to have his own cooking show. The producer agrees to hire him, but only if Peter joins him due to his silliness. Quagmire agrees, but Peter's antics irk him until he finally discharges Peter, so the director decides to give him his own cooking show, which turns out to be more successful than Quagmire's due to Peter's silliness, but when Quagmire calls it an insult to cooking, the director decides to have them compete in a cook off. Joe helps Quagmire with the competition as Cleveland assists Peter with it. During a montage, Joe and Quagmire focus on cooking while Cleveland and Peter goof off. At the competition, the secret ingredient is butter, which turns out to be a dish Peter is good at cooking at. While cooking, Joe eventually destroys Quagmire's cooking supplies, sealing his defeat. Peter, seeing this, has a sudden change of heart and devours his meal for Quagmire to achieve victory. Quagmire is touched by Peter's sacrifice, but decides to forgo the show to preserve their good will to each other.

A song about the Great Bastard, Brynden Rivers

The dark lord brooded high in his tower, in a castle as black as the night. Black was his hair and black was his soul, He feasted on bloodlust and envy, and filled his cup full up with spite, My brother once ruled seven kingdoms, he said to his harridan wife. I'll take what was his and make it all mine. Let his son feel the point of my knife. A brave young boy with hair of gold The dark lord assembled his legions, they gathered around him like crows. And thirsty for blood they boarded their ships...

A song about the Northern Mountains and the Northern Mountain Clan.

A song about Danny Flint, a girl to pretended to be a boy so she could join the Night's Watch.

And there he stood with sword in hand, the last of Darry's ten... And red the grass beneath his feet, and red his banners bright, and red the glow of the setting sun that bathed him in its light, "Come on, come on," the great lord called, "my sword is hungry still." And with a cry of savage rage, They swarmed across the rill...

High in the halls of the kings who are gone Jenny would dance with her ghosts The ones she had lost and the ones she had found And the ones who had loved her the most The ones who’d been gone for so very long She couldn’t remember their names They spun her around on the damp old stones Spun away all her sorrow and pain And she never wanted to leave, never wanted to leave Never wanted to leave, never wanted to leave They danced through the day And into the night through the snow that swept through the hall From winter to summer then winter again Til the walls did crumble and fall And she never wanted to leave, never wanted to leave Never wanted to leave, never wanted to leave And she never wanted to leave, never wanted to leave Never wanted to leave, never wanted to leave

From his throne of bones the Lord of Death looked down on the murdered lord...

My featherbed is deep and soft, and there I'll lay you down, I'll dress you all in yellow silk, and on your head a crown. For you shall be my lady love, and I shall be your lord. I'll always keep you warm and safe, and guard you with my sword. And how she smiled and how she laughed, the maiden of the tree. She spun away and said to him, no featherbed for me. I'll wear a gown of golden leaves, and bind my hair with grass, But you can be my forest love, and me your forest lass.

Off to Gulltown to see the fair maid, heigh-ho, heigh-ho. I'll steal a sweet kiss with the point of my blade, heigh-ho, heigh-ho. I'll make her my love and we'll rest in the shade, heigh-ho, heigh-ho.

Oh, have you seen my boy, good ser? His hair is chestnut brown He'd promised he'd come back to me Our home's in Wendish Town.

Six maids there were in a spring-fed pool...

From there, to here. From here! To there! All black and brown and covered in hair! He smelled that girl on the summer air! The bear! The bear! The maiden fair! Oh, I'm a maid, and I'm pure and fair! I'll never dance with a hairy bear! I called a knight, but you're a bear! All black and brown and covered in hair! He lifted her high in the air! He sniffed and roared and he smelled her there! She kicked and wailed, the maid so fair! He licked the honey all up in her hair! From there to here. From here! To there! All black and brown and covered in hair! He smelled that girl on the summer air! The bear! The bear! The maiden fair! And the bear, the bear! The maiden fair! And the bear, the bear! She sighed and she squealed and she kicked the air! Then she sang: My bear! My bear so fair! And off they went into the summer air! The bear, the bear, And the maiden fair! From there to here. From here! To there! All black and brown and covered in hair! He smelled that girl on the summer air! The bear! The bear! The maiden fair! And the bear, the bear! The maiden fair! And the bear, the bear! The maiden fair! And the bear, the bear! --- A bear there was, a bear, a bear! All black and brown, and covered with hair. The bear! The bear! Oh come they said, oh come to the fair! The fair? Said he, but I'm a bear! All black and brown, and covered with hair! And down the road from here to there. From here! To there! Three boys, a goat and a dancing bear! They danced and spun, all the way to the fair! The fair! The fair! Oh, sweet she was, and pure and fair! The maid with honey in her hair! Her hair! Her hair! The maid with honey in her hair! The bear smelled the scent on the summer air. The bear! The bear! All black and brown and covered with hair! He smelled the scent on the summer air! He sniffed and roared and smelled it there! Honey on the summer air! Oh, I'm a maid, and I'm pure and fair! I'll never dance with a hairy bear! A bear! A bear! I'll never dance with a hairy bear! The bear, the bear! Lifted her high into the air! The bear! The bear! I called for a knight, but you're a bear! A bear, a bear! All black and brown and covered with hair She kicked and wailed, the maid so fair, But he licked the honey from her hair. Her hair! Her hair! He licked the honey from her hair! Then she sighed and squealed and kicked the air! My bear! She sang. My bear so fair! And off they went, from here to there, The bear, the bear, and the maiden fair.

The Dornishman's Wife is a popular and ribald song in Westeros, whose lyrics mock Dornishmen. The song is from the perspective of a man who seduces a Dornishman's wife, and ends up fighting him in a duel. (Lyrics) The Dornishman's wife was as fair as the sun, and her kisses were warmer than spring. But the Dornishman's blade was made of black steel, and its kiss was a terrible thing. The Dornishman's wife would sing as she bathed, in a voice that was sweet as a peach, But the Dornishman's blade had a song of its own, and a bite sharp and cold as a leech. As he lay on the ground with the darkness around, and the taste of his blood on his tongue, His brothers knelt by him and prayed him a prayer, and he smiled and he laughed and he sung, "Brothers, oh brothers, my days here are done, the Dornishman's taken my life, But what does it matter, for all men must die, and I've tasted the Dornishman's wife!"

hey-nonny, hey-nonny, hey-nonny-hey.. The lady sat a-sewing upon a rainy day, hey-nonny, hey-nonny, hey-nonny-hey.. The lady lay a-kissing, upon a mound of Hay.. [1] Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more, Men were deceivers ever, One foot in sea and one on shore, To one thing constant never. Then sigh not so, but let them go, And be you blithe and bonny, Converting all your sounds of woe Into Hey, nonny nonny. Sing no more ditties, sing no mo Of dumps so dull and heavy. The fraud of men was ever so, Since summer first was leavy. Then sigh not so, but let them go And be you blithe and bonny, Converting all your sounds of woe Into Hey, nonny nonny.

Ooooooh, I am the last of the giants, my people are gone from the earth. The last of the great mountain giants, who ruled all the world at my birth. Oh the smallfolk have stolen my forests, they’ve stolen my rivers and hills. And the’ve built a great wall through my valleys, and fished all the fish from my rills. In stone halls they burn their great fires, in stone halls they forge their sharp spears. Whilst I walk alone in the mountains, with no true companion but tears. They hunt me with dogs in the daylight, they hunt me with torches by night. For these men who are small can never stand tall, whilst giants still walk in the light. Oooooooh, I am the LAST of the giants, so learn well the words of my song. For when I am gone the singing will fade, and the silence shall last long and long.[

And who are you, the proud lord said, that I must bow so low? Only a cat of a different coat, that's all the truth I know. In a coat of gold or a coat of red, a lion still has claws, And mine are long and sharp, my lord, as long and sharp as yours. And so he spoke, and so he spoke, that Lord of Castamere, But now the rains weep o'er his hall, with no one there to hear. Yes now the rains weep o'er his hall, and not a soul to hear.

I loved a maid as fair as summer with sunlight in her hair. I loved a maid as red as autumn with sunset in her hair. I loved a maid as white as winter with moonglow in her hair.

The Father's face is stern and strong, he sits and judges right from wrong. He weighs our lives, the short and long, and loves the little children The Mother gives the gift of life, and watches over every wife. Her gentle smile ends all strife, and she loves her little children The Warrior stands before the foe, protecting us where e'er we go. With sword and shield and spear and bow, he guards the little children. The Crone is very wise and old, and sees our fates as they unfold. She lifts her lamp of shining gold to lead the little children. The Smith, he labors day and night, to put the world of men to right. With hammer, plow, and fire bright, he builds for little children. The Maiden dances through the sky, she lives in every lover's sigh. Her smiles teach the birds to fly, and gives dreams to little children. The Seven Gods who made us all, are listening if we should call. So close your eyes, you shall not fall, they see you, little children. Just close your eyes, you shall not fall, they see you, little children.

And the stars in the night were the eyes of his wolf, and the wind itself was their song...

A book of erotica

A telling of the history of the War Across the Water.

A biography of Grand Maester Aethelmure of the Citadel.

A book about the unnatural magic arts performed by Valyrian bloodmages, including their possible creation of dragons.

Tells of the reign of Lord Commander Orbert Caswell in the Night's Watch and First Ranger Stane of Skagos.

Partial text in the Sept of Peasedale which includes information on the House of Fisher of the riverlands.

A questionable telling of the life of Lord Alyn Velaryon.

A telling of the fall of the Kingdom of Sarnor.

A telling of the early history of Pentos and Lorath.

A telling of history which includes information on Baelor the Blessed

An incomplete text with information about dragons. The only known copy is in the vault under the Citadel.

A telling of the history of the Summer Isles.

A telling of the history of Maidenpool in the riverlands.

A possible history of the Targaryens, Dorne, and House Martell.

An illustrated book of dragons housed at Castle Black.

A rare Valyrian scroll found in the Winterfall library.

A catalog of the carvings found on axes and other weapons.

A telling of the tale of the Braavos adventurer, Terrio Erastes while he lived with the Dothraki.

A telling of the life of Lord Alyn Velaryon.

A telling of the history of the free folk town of Hardhome.

Cataloged the existence of 227 Valyrian steel blades in Westeros.

A telling of stories and legends of Essos and the Jade Sea.

A telling of this history of the Volantene triarch, Horonno.

A telling of this history of Galladon of Morne.

A telling (and debunking) of the legends and tales of the First Men, the Others, and the founding of Valyria.

Lives of Four Kings is a history book about kings of the Targaryen dynasty of Seven Kingdoms, written by Grand Maester Kaeth. It begins with the reign of King Daeron the Young Dragon and continues until the end of the reign of Daeron the Good. It is considered a classic, and a book which every good ruler should read.

A telling of this history of the grave sites and tombs of the North.

A collection of Dornish letters.

A history of the warrior women of Kayakayanaya, Samyriana and Bayasabhad

A telling of the fall of the Kingdom of Sarnor.

A telling of the history of the Ironborn.

A book of visions by Daenys Targaryen.

Ironborn legends

An incomplete book accounting the history of the Kingdom of Sarnor.

A tome recording the deeds of every member of the Kingsguard throughout history.

A holy book of the Faith of the Seven.

A book outlining known or books previously lost to history. It includes claims of obtaining partial text from the legendary Signs and Portents.

A telling of the terrible history of Longsister, an island of the Vale of the Bite.

A telling of this history of the invasion of Dorne from the point of view of the Young Dragon king.

The Dance of Dragons, A True Telling is a history book about the great civil war in the Seven Kingdoms known as the Dance of the Dragons, fought between two rival branches of House Targaryen, one led by Rhaenyra Targaryen and the other by her half-brother Aegon II Targaryen. It was written by Grand Maester Munkun, who lived through the war.

A telling of the history and background on Skagos.

A telling of the fall of the Kingdom of Sarnor.

A telling of the history of the Valyrian Freehold.

A telling of the history of the ironborn control of the riverlands.

A unfinished book about the First Blackfyre Rebellion.

An account of history told by a court jester, Mushroom.

A book of history and geography.

A telling of tales of the North and beyond The Wall.

A telling of the history of the White Harbor.

A "mammoth" work of the history of the women who ruled after the Dance of the Dragons. The time was known as the Winter of Widows.

A telling of history about the House of Stark and Winterfell.

Tales of the nine wonders made by men.

A book of the seven wonders created by the gods.

A play performed by the mummers in Braavos.

A play performed by the mummers of Braavos. The seven-faced god has cheated me. My noble sire he made of purest gold, and gold he made my siblings, boy and girl. But I am formed of darker stuff, of bones and blood and clay, twisted into this rude shape you see before you. Give me the cup, he told the Stranger, for I shall drink deep. And if it tastes of gold and lion's blood, so much the better. As I cannot be the hero, let me be the monster, and lesson them in fear in place of love. Oh, no, no, no. Don't, oh don't, don't touch me. Please, m'lord, I am still a maiden.

A play performed by the mummers of Braavos.

A play performed by the mummers of Braavos.