A man and his vampire girlfriend stand facing each other in the middle of an empty playground on a dark, foggy night. The man tells his vampire girlfriend that they need to break up. She wants to know why, assuming it has something to do with her biting him, because she's a vampire after all. The boyfriend assures her that he loves her and her vampire TV show, but the real problem is his cable. The vampire honey tells him that if he switches to AT&T U-verse, he'll be happier with his television viewing and then they can stay together. Forever. Mu-ha-ha. He agrees and the two embrace, where the vampire bites him. The man then informs her that her biting really is a problem for him. 
"Vampire -- AT&T U-verse Customer Satisfaction"

Voiceover, Dialog, Spoken Text, Script, or Lyrics

We need to break up.  
Is it the biting, 'cause I can stop. 
No, I love you and your show. It's cable. 
Customers are more satisfied with U-verse. Switch and we can stay together forever.  
Forever? Ow! Not gonna lie to you, it's also the biting. 
Break up with cable. Choose U-verse TV from $19 a month for 2 years.

Written Text

Break up with cable, not your shows. 
AT&T U-verse TV 
$19 a month for 2 years 
Mobilizing Your World

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