ALF

Trevor Noah's unlikely path from apartheid South Africa to the desk of The Daily Show began with a criminal act: his birth. Trevor was born to a white Swiss father and a black Xhosa mother at a time when such a union was punishable by five years in prison. Living proof of his parents' indiscretion, Trevor was kept mostly indoors for the earliest years of his life, bound by the extreme and often absurd measures his mother took to hide him from a government that could, at any moment, steal him away. Finally liberated by the end of South Africa's tyrannical white rule, Trevor and his mother set forth on a grand adventure, living openly and freely and embracing the opportunities won by a centuries-long struggle. Born a Crime is the story of a mischievous young boy who grows into a restless young man as he struggles to find himself in a world where he was never supposed to exist. It is also the story of that young man's relationship with his fearless, rebellious, and fervently religious mother-his teammate, a woman determined to save her son from the cycle of poverty, violence, and abuse that would ultimately threaten her own life. The stories collected here are by turns hilarious, dramatic, and deeply affecting. Whether subsisting on caterpillars for dinner during hard times, being thrown from a moving car during an attempted kidnapping, or just trying to survive the life-and-death pitfalls of dating in high school, Trevor illuminates his curious world with an incisive wit and unflinching honesty. His stories weave together to form a moving and searingly funny portrait of a boy making his way through a damaged world in a dangerous time, armed only with a keen sense of humor and a mother's unconventional, unconditional love.

Elliot experiences a twisted sitcom version of a family road trip with Tyrell locked in the trunk, featuring ALF. Mr. Robot encourages him to keep his eyes forward until he is ready to wake up in the hospital. Ray lets him know that he is Elliot's master. Upon being locked away by Lone Star, Elliot hugs Mr. Robot for protecting his mind during the beating. A flashback reveals that, the day Elliot's father told him he was fired for being sick, he also let Elliot name the new computer store. Cisco receives equipment from the Dark Army for fsociety's FBI hack, but they break off a hypodermic needle in his finger for asking too many questions. Dom was spared in the shooting, as both attackers killed themselves. Though the attack gets blamed on Chinese separatists, she is determined to investigate the Dark Army. Congress refuses to move forward with Phillip Price's bailout plan to borrow from China because four FBI agents were killed there. Darlene and Mobley coach Angela through hacking the FBI, but Dom appears just before she can finish.

Promoting a new book she has written, Leslie falls victim to some less-than-professional journalism.

Fresh off her Harvest Festival success, Leslie takes her crew on a camping trip, hoping the group will come up with a new, big idea for the Parks Department.

Corporate assigns Michael to have counseling with Toby. Dwight vows revenge on a shop owner at the Steamtown Mall and Pam tries to change her job title.

Peter knocks out Quahog's cable transmitter while driving Meg home. Distraught, Peter resolves to steal the transmitter so he can have television in his house and convinces Meg to take the blame for the outage. The device is stolen by Stewie, who intends to use it to control the weather. Peter attaches a cardboard cutout in front of his face to pretend that the world is a television program. Meg, tired of public scorn, reveals the truth behind the cable outage; the citizens of Quahog threaten Peter with violence, but he is saved by Lois. Peter takes his family on recreational outings, but the family grows tired of the constant physical activity, prompting Peter to go on the outings with William Shatner. After the weather machine creates a huge rainstorm, Meg and Lois drive around searching for Peter, and Meg runs over Shatner and Peter; Peter is hospitalized. Peter watches television while he recovers, and becomes addicted to it once again.

Jimmy is working as a Security Guard on a day that Heidi Klum is on the lot, preparing to film a special for Victoria's Secret. He catches a man sneaking into Heidi's trailer and is hailed a hero for protecting her from a creepy fan. Christine is upset that Jimmy's job is dangerous and wants him to find a new, safer position at the Studio. Meanwhile, Greg is trying to kick his addiction to nasal spray.

April ponders her future while visiting Washington, D.C. with Leslie. Back in Pawnee, Andy tries to find his wife the perfect job.

Jess and Schmidt try fitting in with younger people who have moved in across the hall from them. Nick works extra hard to prank Schmidt.

Krusty the Clown is in a rut when his show gets cancelled and his talent agency dumps him, so the Simpsons introduce him to seasoned agent Annie (voiced by Joan Rivers), who turns out to be Krusty's first agent from many years ago.

The NFL commercial features a ton of new and old pop culture TV references. The are saying everyone is part of the NFL family of fans. It begins with a car pulling up outside of the Brady Bunch house with a big football player in the front yard. We then see characters from Happy Days with a Green Bay Packers helmet serving bowl and the Fonze wearing a jersy, some girls from 90210 in Raiders gear, and Jerry and Kramer from Seinfeld in Giants and Bills clothes. We then see Andy and Dwight from The Office in front of a Super Bowl Party Planning Committee sign with everyone in Steelers gear, The Sopranos in Jets outfits, Jerry from Seinfeld in a Giants sweatshirt and Newman in a Cowboys costume, Norm from Cheers in a Patriots jersey, ???, the Golden Girls putting out food for a football party, and Joey and Jesse from Full House in 49ers stuff. We then see Bo and Luke Duke from the Dukes of Hazzard with a Falcon fuzzy dice on the General Lee, the Family Guy gang in jerseys including Cleveland Brown in a Browns sweatshirt, Bert and some Muppet friends, the dad and Urkel from Family matters playing with a football with food for the big game in Bears clothes, the Marsha football nose-smashing scene from The Brady Bunch, and ALF in a Panthers shirt. Barney and the gang from How I Met Your Mother, the Fonza making the TV work by pounding it, the cast of friends in Jets shirts, Family Guy watching the Big Game and Peter has a Patriots jersey with "Hi Tom" (Brady) on the back, the Glee case, part of the Modern Family cast, a large group from the system gathered to watch the game, and the Fonz again. We then get the simple words, "Best. Fans. Ever." followed by the kids from South Park worried about missing the commercials. Alright it's party time. I've got three different types of pretzels, I've got six different types of salsa... chocolate ice cream, vanilla ice cream... 48 pack of waffles, a gallon of barbecue sauce. 20 seconds to "go time" - carb up. (Ding dong) I'll get it. Hello Newman. Norm! Hi there, how are my girls? We're ready to serve the appetizers. Great we'll be down there. We got you Uncle Jesse. Yee haw! You're already here? No way! Hey come on in guys. Don't don't Steve! My nose. Did I do that? Everyone, if I may direct your attention to the television. Super Bowl XLV is electric here in Dallas. My favorite thing in America. Excuse me, pardon me. A beautiful day for anything and everything. Hurry, we can't miss the commercials. NFL Best. Fans. Ever.

"ALF's Cell Phone: RadioShack #InWithTheNew" This ad begins with 80's TV alien, ALF, at a RadioShack complaining about how his ancient cell phone won't play any music. The Shack salesman shows him a new smartphone that can do a lot more than his old one. We get some classic ALF jokes when the man shows a picture of a kitten on the TV and ALF refers to it as a cooking show (ALF's favorite food was cats). The salesman then shows the fury alien how to play music on wireless Bluetooth speakers, but ALF doesn't like the guy's choice of music, so changes the song. Salesman: So, what can I help you with today? ALF: Oh, my cell phone. I can't get it to play any music. Huh? Nothin' Salesman: Okay, well, it's easy to fix that. You can actually use this phone to do a lot of things. You can use it as a webcam. Check it out. ALF: Oh ho, yeah. Handsome guy. Salesman: You can use it as a remote control. ALF: Oh, a cooking show. Nice. Salesman: Okay. And you can even use it to play music that way it should be played. Bluetooth speaker. (Lyrics) O.M.G. oh oh oh I want to be free (Lyrics) RadioShack, Radio Shack

The 80s called ... they want their store back. 80s celebrities invade a RadioShack to take back their old stuff and make room for the RadioShack of the future. "The Phone Call: #InWithTheNew RadioShack Commercial (official version)" (Phone rings) Radio Shack. Oh, OK. What? The 80s called. They want their store back. Hey. Go, go, go! It's time for a new Radio Shack. Come see what's possible when we do things together. You're too late. (Lyrics) Everyone's watchin' to see what you will do Everyone's looking at you, oh Everybody's working for the weekend Everybody needs a second chance, oh You want a piece of my heart Radio Shack VCRs R radioshack Do. It. Together. radioshack.com/dit

This is a trailer for the 2013 Television sitcom, 'The Goldbergs' airing on ABC, beginning September 24, 2013. "The Goldbergs - Official Trailer" Back in the 80s before Twitter, Facebook and Instagram... Happy birthday! What do you want for breakfast? Privacy! Oh, please. Don't forget to wash your bottom. ...my family had only one way to communicate. At the top of our lungs. I'm home. My dad. TV's mine! My mom. Dinner time! Fine. I'll eat the way I'll die. Alone. My sister, Erica. Adam, I'm gonna crimp your face! Mom! My brother, Barry. It's jingling. It's keys! Keys means car, car means freedom from all you monsters, I love you mom. What the hell is this? It's a locket. It's got my picture inside so you can always have your mother near your heart. I wasn't just a member of the family. You, Erica, Barry, uh, what's your name. I was the kid who captured it all on the magic of videotape. Stop with the camera! I got you something and I think you're gonna like it. REO Speedwagon? This is top 40! I talked to the guy at Sam Goody, he said it was a hip track. Well, did you talk to Sam Goody himself? You weren't there, OK? The guy had an earring, he had a jean jacket covered in buttons. Covered! You're killing your father. I hope you're having a happy birthday. Come on! This is not fair! Who the hell told you life was fair, you moron? Dad's colorful way of speaking may seem a bit harsh, but it really wasn't. You just had to learn how to speak Murray. It's 2:00 AM. I thought you were dead! I could kill you! You broke it. It's amazing. You little bastards ruin everything. And that's my grandpa. I hear someone turned 16 and could use a new car. Holy crap, for me? Not gonna happen, dad. We've decided Barry can't drive. The only one who understands me is Flava Flav. Who runs like that? Unh. Unh. Pops, you OK? So who wants nuggets? Dad, your mind is not what it used to be. You can't boss me around. You lose your keys, Barry gets some keys. It's the circle of driving. Does this mean I can drive? Yes! No! Hon, I said Barry was not ready and you agreed. In my defense, I wasn't listening. You're riding the brake. Let him pass. Who? The guy on the moped. Get out, I'm taking the wheel. No! You said it was my turn. Circle of driving. Open up! No! Open up! No! No! No! Guys, please stop fighting. OK, we're rolling. Go, go, go! Oh, come on. Not REO Speedwagon. Seriously? Hey! This is good stuff. (singing) What started out as friendship's getting stronger. Come on. ...to let it show. Here we go! Join me. And I can't stop this feeling anymore. Look at you! If you take away my car, you take away my time with my grandson. Getting waffles with that little guy, it's the best part of my week. You know, I don't say it a lot, but, you're not a total moron all the time. Are those the kids' baby blankets? Sometimes I smell them when I feel sad. That's not weird, is it? Well, a little weird. My world is caving in. They're growing up and don't need me as much. What do I have? Me. I'm not going anywhere. Alright, let me have a sniff Coming to ABC. You're invited back to a golden era. With the Goldbergs. I raised a moron. (Lyrics) I can't stop The way I feel Things you do I won't make it On my own (Lyrics) Everybody Everybody have fun tonight Everybody have fun tonight Everybody Wang Chung tonight Everybody have fun tonight, Everybody Wang Chung tonight So if you're feeling low Everybody Wang Chung tonight Everybody have fun tonight Everybody have fun tonight (Lyrics) What started out as friendship Has grown stronger I only wish I had the strength to let it show And I can't fight this feeling anymore I've forgotten what I started fighting for It's time to bring this ship into the shore And throw away the oars, forever 'Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore I've forgotten what I started fighting for And if I have to crawl upon the floor 'Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore I've forgotten what I started fighting for And if I have to crawl upon the floor Come

In 2010, four good friends have had a string of bad luck with their adult lives: Adam has been dumped by his girlfriend; Lou is a party guy who cannot find the party; Nick's wife controls his every move; and Adam's video game obsessed nephew Jacob will not leave his basement. After a crazy night of drinking in a ski resort hot tub, the men wake up, heads pounding, in the year 1986. The friends can see each other as their proper age, but when they look at their reflections and to everyone else they appear as they did in 1986 (aside from Jacob). The quartet of men are at first concerned they must not mess anything up but then decide this may be a chance to change their destinies and get the futures (and women) they wanted.